“Profiles in Seattle-ness” #1: Watson Kennedy

You know, it occurred to me the other day that, in-between the poems and the short stories and the steady bursts of self-promotion, I’m doing a disservice to my readers as a self-proclaimed entertainer (also, professional assassin and international sex symbol, but I suppose I don’t mention those as frequently) by not filling the gaps with more blog-friendly forays into humorous esoterica and/or random stuff lying around where I sleep.

In the spirit of reforming this inequity, I hereby start another series called Profiles in Seattle-ness, in which I illustrate some features of my current home base with which out-of-city (possibly even in-city!) folk may not be familiar. First off, we have Watson Kennedy, a “purveyor of fine goods” which boasts not one, but two locations in the Emerald City: one at the intersection of First and Spring in the heart of downtown, and the other nestled within Pike Place Market mere blocks away. This humble chain is the proud recipient of the “National Retail Excellence Award for Visual Merchandising,” and it’s impossible to not see why once you step inside one of their fine-looking, feeling, smelling stores. Essentially, if you are a fan of Sherlock Holmes, Victorian knick-knacks, European culture, or anything else that dates back to when the right mustache and croquet set could undo even the tightest girdle, then by all means, do please follow the nearest cufflinked pointing hand to Watson Kennedy.

Even if you don’t fit those qualifications, you’re sure to find something that piques your interest! After visiting both branches, I saw a children’s counting book based on Jane Eyre, balls made of buttons, an isolated photograph of Oscar Wilde (which may not have actually been for sale; a shame), and remarkable items such as the following:

Randomized word cubes that initially appear to issue gross insults!


Signs that allow you to spell out the lyrics to Justin Bieber songs!


Novelty underwear tags!


Miniature volumes guaranteed to deeply confuse future archaeologists and librarians!


A portable version of the store’s business manifesto!



More curiosities: orange soap, light switch covers, watch faces in a bowl like so much candy, and literally just a drawer full of random black-and-white photographs! So again, for the steampunk enthusiast, the nostalgic, the technophobe, and those who just think their life could use a touch of fanciness from days gone by (and really who, who doesn’t?), I highly recommend you check out the above link and the store it represents with all speed.